So, a month without make-up - it's been a long one! I didn't quite realise how dependent on make-up I was until I banned myself from using it - I worked out I've been wearing it almost every single day since I was 12 - that's over half my life! Once I'd figured this out, it helped me understand why I was finding it quite so difficult and feeling fairly repulsed when I was looking at myself in the mirror with a make-up-free face...It took me nearly two weeks to get used to my 'natural' face, particularly when I was at work - when I caught my face in the mirror at work I felt like I just looked like a child playing dress up in work clothes.
To give some history, I started wearing make-up so regularly and so young to both cover up my bad skin (foundation/concealer) and to draw attention away from my awful buck teeth (thick eyeliner / mascara). Quickly, it became a habit, part of my routine, part of me - I wouldn't go out the house without any on - it made me feel better. I was first challenged about my dependence on make-up by a youth-leader when I was 17 - I knew it wasn't healthy to dislike my natural face so much and need to wear make-up to feel okay about myself, but I felt like there was no way at all I'd ever be able to give it up. Sounds extreme, but it's taken me almost 9 years from hearing the challenge to feel secure enough in myself to actually make the step of giving it up for a month.
I wish I could say that by giving up make-up for a month I have come to appreciate my 'natural' appearance. I am still finding it difficult to look at myself in the mirror and look at photos of myself from the past month. However, I think I have managed to slowly cut down on the number of lies I am telling myself about how awful my natural appearance is - I have been learning that there are far more important and significant things in life than what my face looks like - whenever I am having a particularly horrible feeling day (girls, I think you'll know what I mean!) I have been trying to focus on more eternally beautiful things. One quote from Tom Wright, Bishop of Durham, has really spoken to me:
"the voice of God calls us all to celebrate, despite all our remaining puzzles and fears, the fact that we have a God who has not left us to muddle through on our own, but who has issued in blood and fire - his own blood, his own fire - the call to follow him in his work of recreating and healing his battered and beautiful world."
Another thing I have been thinking about and doing some investigation on is the use of slaves in make-up production. What I have found has really helped give me some greater perspective on my fears and insecurities - children are being made to suffer so that I can make my eyes sparkle:
"Deep in the jungle of Jharkhand state in eastern India, at the end of a rutted track passable only by motorbike, a six-year-old girl named Sonia sat in the scorching midday sun, sifting jagged stones in an open-cast mine in the hope of earning enough money for a meal. Sonia was halfway through her working day and she was already exhausted and dishevelled. Her hair was matted and her pretty flower-patterned dress spoilt by dust. She barely had enough energy to glance at her eight-year-old cousin Guri, toiling intently beside her as they searched the stones for pieces of mica… If the girls spotted enough mica, they might earn 63p each for a 12-hour day. If they found none, they would probably go hungry." (Times Online, July 2009)
Mica is the stone which is used to produce the shimmer that is found in make up. There is a price to pay in beauty - read more at http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article6719151.ece
I've found it fairly difficult to find out which make-up brands, if any are slavery free - if you know of any please get in touch!! Such slavery is an incentive for me, if there was any, to not wear make up often, if at all.
I have been looking forward to tomorrow (the day the make-up fast should end) all month. But, I feel like I'm probably not going to be able to break this dependence I have on make-up fully if I give up now. However much I don't want to say it, I think I need to continue. For the next month at least (until 9th of June), I am only going to allow myself to wear make-up at the weekends and I am not going to buy any more until I can find a responsible trader. Now I've put it on here, I feel as though I'm accountable to anyone who is reading this - feel free to challenge me further....!
To give some history, I started wearing make-up so regularly and so young to both cover up my bad skin (foundation/concealer) and to draw attention away from my awful buck teeth (thick eyeliner / mascara). Quickly, it became a habit, part of my routine, part of me - I wouldn't go out the house without any on - it made me feel better. I was first challenged about my dependence on make-up by a youth-leader when I was 17 - I knew it wasn't healthy to dislike my natural face so much and need to wear make-up to feel okay about myself, but I felt like there was no way at all I'd ever be able to give it up. Sounds extreme, but it's taken me almost 9 years from hearing the challenge to feel secure enough in myself to actually make the step of giving it up for a month.
I wish I could say that by giving up make-up for a month I have come to appreciate my 'natural' appearance. I am still finding it difficult to look at myself in the mirror and look at photos of myself from the past month. However, I think I have managed to slowly cut down on the number of lies I am telling myself about how awful my natural appearance is - I have been learning that there are far more important and significant things in life than what my face looks like - whenever I am having a particularly horrible feeling day (girls, I think you'll know what I mean!) I have been trying to focus on more eternally beautiful things. One quote from Tom Wright, Bishop of Durham, has really spoken to me:
"the voice of God calls us all to celebrate, despite all our remaining puzzles and fears, the fact that we have a God who has not left us to muddle through on our own, but who has issued in blood and fire - his own blood, his own fire - the call to follow him in his work of recreating and healing his battered and beautiful world."
Another thing I have been thinking about and doing some investigation on is the use of slaves in make-up production. What I have found has really helped give me some greater perspective on my fears and insecurities - children are being made to suffer so that I can make my eyes sparkle:
"Deep in the jungle of Jharkhand state in eastern India, at the end of a rutted track passable only by motorbike, a six-year-old girl named Sonia sat in the scorching midday sun, sifting jagged stones in an open-cast mine in the hope of earning enough money for a meal. Sonia was halfway through her working day and she was already exhausted and dishevelled. Her hair was matted and her pretty flower-patterned dress spoilt by dust. She barely had enough energy to glance at her eight-year-old cousin Guri, toiling intently beside her as they searched the stones for pieces of mica… If the girls spotted enough mica, they might earn 63p each for a 12-hour day. If they found none, they would probably go hungry." (Times Online, July 2009)
Mica is the stone which is used to produce the shimmer that is found in make up. There is a price to pay in beauty - read more at http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article6719151.ece
I've found it fairly difficult to find out which make-up brands, if any are slavery free - if you know of any please get in touch!! Such slavery is an incentive for me, if there was any, to not wear make up often, if at all.
I have been looking forward to tomorrow (the day the make-up fast should end) all month. But, I feel like I'm probably not going to be able to break this dependence I have on make-up fully if I give up now. However much I don't want to say it, I think I need to continue. For the next month at least (until 9th of June), I am only going to allow myself to wear make-up at the weekends and I am not going to buy any more until I can find a responsible trader. Now I've put it on here, I feel as though I'm accountable to anyone who is reading this - feel free to challenge me further....!
next installment please ladies!! x
ReplyDeleteNatanya-joy